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Английские короткие анекдоты

В разделе представлены английские шутки и анекдоты на разнообразные темы.

Early one morning, one of the gods was galloping around Mount Olympus. Invigorated by the brisk breeze, he shouted euphorically, "I'm Thor!"

His stallion looked back at him and reminded him, "That'th becauthe you forgot the thaddle, thilly!"

Did you hear about the skeleton who walked into a cafe?

He ordered a cup of coffee and a mop.

Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw?

Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard?

Mary: John says I'm pretty. Andy says I'm ugly. What do you think, Peter?
Peter: I think you're pretty ugly.

My boss is so unpopular even his own shadow refuses to follow him.

"Do you know what really amazes me about you?"

"No. What?"

"Oops. Sorry. I was thinking about someone else!"

Why do we park our car in the driveway and drive our car on the parkway?

If tin whistles are made of tin, what are fog horns made of?

If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?

A man receives a phone call from his doctor.
The doctor says: "I have some good news and some bad news."
The man says: "OK, give me the good news first."
The doctor says: "The good news is, you have 24 hours to live."
The man replies: "Oh no! If that's the good news, then what's the bad news?"
The doctor says: "The bad news is, I forgot to call you yesterday."

Подкасты - современный способ изучения английского языка. Просто загрузите их себе на компьютер или плеер из раздела подкасты и слушайте английский в любое время и в любом месте. На данный момент в разделе свыше 80 подкастов.